Benjamin Zulu advises on preserving oneself for marriage

You cannot be giving yourself to someone for free then hoping another person will come along and pay full price for the same thing - Zulu

Piece by: TIFFANY KIRUNGA
Entertainment

• Benjamin Zulu gave guidance to those who are seeking to get married.

• If you want to end up in a successful marriage it is important to preserve yourself lest you find yourself struggling to find "the one"

Benjamin Zulu
Image: Instagram

Life coach and psychologist Benjamin Zulu has given guidance to those who are seeking to get married.

He stated that if you want to end up in a successful marriage it is important to preserve yourself lest you find yourself struggling to find "the one"

"You cannot be giving yourself to someone for free then hoping another person will come along and pay full price for the same thing, committing himself exclusively to you, paying the price culturally and socially," he said.

He goes on to advise that men are not foolish, especially those who are looking for a lifelong commitment. 

If you are looking to earn the respect you cannot cut corners and anticipate having a stable marriage. There is always a price to be paid.

The life coach's advice is not only limited to chastity but rather character and maturity.

He does not see any reason why someone else would agree to pay a premium price for someone who has exposed themselves for empty promises.  

"If you once lived carelessly, there must be at least a track record of a changed life since when you turned your life around," the trainer explained.

He stated that this did not only imply to women but men too. The men who are building themselves and taking care of themselves for marriage, not those who are not, men who are capable of faithfulness, men of character.

When a man who has prepared himself is ready for a long life commitment he will also want a woman who was preparing herself for the same. 

"Marriage requires a certain degree of discipline and integrity, and without it, people will just slaughter each other in whatever unions they try to get into," he continued to say in a post he shared on his socials. 

The psychologist emphasized that men are jealous and territorial and they cannot easily withstand another man lingering around in one's life, even if the purpose is co-parenting.

He explained that this could be a reason for a man to keep away even if his motive was to marry you.

"Understand this principle and stop debating about celibacy or you can go on 'servicing' passersby and when the real husband materials arrive and refuse to engage with you, you get bitter and become an activist," Zulu voiced.

He closed his argument by saying that there are two types of men one will encounter in the market. An eater and a keeper.

An eater will dangle marriage and the future to eat you now. On the other hand, a man who will want you for a long-term commitment will not be focused on doing this. His interest is in your value and doing right by you.

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