Catherine Njeri, the woman who has become an inspiration to many especially suicide survivors, is bold and courageous. Njeri, alumni of the University of Nairobi, went through hell in campus and she reached a point where she contemplated committing suicide five times.
She had had enough but God wasn't done with her and gave her a second chance. She is alive and now serving as an encouragement to others going through a hard time, by using her sad yet inspiring life story.
Well, Catherine Njeri has shared yet another weird revelation about herself and she says she's a 'strange creature with two opposing minds in one body'.
Here is her confession;
"I am a strange creature with two opposing minds in one body( sadly, my body is too small for these two minds lol).
Two distinct life forces in me keep trying to control my actions.
There are things about myself that scare me. Things like a great inner need that can't be explained. Like the constant need for love and fulfillment. Also, those subtle desires that surface on occasion, making me prone to sin, contrary to my better nature."
She goes ahead to say..,
"I can't explain why I am such a dual person when it comes to right and wrong. The evil that I hate is always present in me. The good and moral desires are there too, keeping my mind in constant turmoil. It is not every day, all day long battle, but the evil, at times, tries to overpower me.
Just when I think I've got my act together, things fall apart, and once again I am doing things I really don't want to do.
I know there is a part of me that wants to obey God. It has nothing to do with church or moralizing do-gooders. It is even more than just a desire for forgiveness. It is more than just getting my soul saved. It has nothing to do with the fear of Hell or damnation. It is even more than a need for peace and fulfillment. It is a need, in the very deep of my soul, to know God in a very personal way and to feel his love.
Lots of alcoholics and addicts pour out their pitiful stories to me. Almost without exception, I hear the same confession: "I hate it! It's turned me into an animal. It was fun at first, but now it's destroying me. I'm like two people. I'm hooked by a mind habit; now I can't stop myself. Still deep in my heart, I want to be free. Show me how to get out."
I read the Bible and discover I am not the only person caught in a struggle between good and evil. David was a man loved by God. Yet he committed adultery with Bathsheba, then murdered her husband to keep him from discovering she was pregnant. He was driven to despair. He admitted, 'My sins are over my head....They are too high for me. I can't understand myself....There is no soundness in my flesh....There is no rest in my bones because of my sin. My loins are filled with a loathsome disease'.
However, despite all, I need no longer fear to slip or fall. He will keep me, love me, and bring me to glory by his power. No one has ever drowned when swimming upstream toward Christ. No one is left bleeding by the wayside if he is wounded in his struggle to be free."
Catherine Njeri's followers have reacted to her confession and here is what some had to say;
James: Well said. Prayers will do.
Luke: I would be deceiving myself if I denied having such two opposing minds in one.Every human is always battling between the good and bad within him/herself
Olivia: Deep! At some point, I thought you were talking about me
Wambui: Strange but I can say I am able to stay completely morally upright for years.
Onzima: Just dumbfounded. This article is spot on!
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