It is said that Kenyan culture is unique and shares similar practices. Wherever a Kenyan is in the world, you can be assured of these ten characteristics of their households
1. There is a paperbag of paperbags
Okay, plastic bags were banned a while back but these new supermarket bags still play by the same rule under the sink where the custodian bag is taking care of all the other extra bags you have… these are a testament of your poor planning skills because you are always forgetting to carry a bag.
2. A soaked ugali sufuria overnight
There is no Kenyan that’s strong enough to wash the ugali sufuria on the same night. If you are able to, you should be investigated by the police.
3. The soap dish and scotch-brite are kept on the kitchen window next to the sink with a soaked steel wool
Who told Kenyans that this is how we should run a kitchen? You can literally walk in to a Kenyans kitchen today and wash the dishes without asking “Wapi scotch brite?”
4. The ice-cream container in the fridge that contains leftovers
Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night and gone to the fridge hoping that there is food by some luck and bump in to an ice-cream container from years past thinking “Kumbe kuna ice cream hapa?” only to get left over sukuma wiki from dinner?
5. The default meal is Ugali, Nyama and Sukuma Wiki
Yes, there is nothing else that we are creative enough to think about when we have no option. There is always that Mama mboga that lives close by that you tell “Kata kata ya 20 bob haraka”
6. There is a fancy chocolate/biscuit container that is used for storage
Yes, Kenyans don’t like getting rid of fancy containers especially if its for cookies and chocolates. This box probably contains needles and threads or jewelry.
7. Empty soda bottles
The plastic bottles have reduced this but I can promise you that these still exist. Yes, you have that “Incase wageni watokee” stash of bottles because you don’t want to pay for deposit. To be fair, ten bob is expensive.
The first drug that any Kenyans take is Panadol. As a kid when I tried to avoid going to school by pretending to be sick, the first thing I was told is “Umekula panadol?”. Yes, there is that old cookie container that just contained different types of panadol. “Tumbo inakuuma? Panadol… Ulianguka? Panadol… You were dumped? Panadol…”
9. A box of candles and a torch because we all know about blackouts
10. At your parents house, an old VCR…