Random Thoughts: rethinking the "Sponsor" culture

Piece by: Random Like Arum
Exclusives

“This sponsor culture is ruining young people’s lives”- Moral argument (probably)

There's been a massive uproar concerning ‘sponsor’ culture. A sponsor is defined as someone who simply funds a lifestyle of another in return for companionship or intimacy. Both parties benefit, the sponsored getting access to money and the sponsor having companionship or even sex.

There are various debates on the sponsor culture ranging from “It’s not moral”, “It’s for lazy people” or “it’s unfair for the young people who are missing out on potential partners”. In fact, people who have sponsors whether men or women are often judged very harshly for being sponsored. “Why can’t they work hard for their own money?”

We judge sponsored people harshly while equally being fascinated by them. If we are to look at it critically, there really are flimsy arguments against being sponsored.

“It is prostitution”

The oldest trade in mankind has been this. For centuries, men mostly have paid for sex in an attempt to cater for their needs. Maybe if men were generally better at controlling their urges this wouldn’t be much of a problem. How many times have you heard a man say “But he was just being a man” when justifying unacceptable sexual predatory behavior towards a woman?

Men are also prostitutes. A lady can literally get a sexual encounter if she wanted to at any moment by texting a random guy in her contact list, even a stranger “Come here... I want you now”. Imagine how much harder it is for a young broke man who is in desperate need of some cash to ignore this lure of a financially able woman who is willing to cater for his needs. In a society that judges men on their status and ability to provide, it’s inevitable that there will always be men who are willing to be sponsored.

“It’s against tradition”

In some traditional society, whenever a person had considerable wealth, they would marry or engage another partner. In fact, in some societies such as the Maasai women would practice polyandry. This practice was justified by scarcity of resources, high male mortality and husband absenteeism. Sometimes we blindly justify our opinions using the ‘Tradition’ argument when in reality some traditional practices were wild and crazy going by today’s standards.

If you were the wealthy person in the traditional society, chances are that you too would be scouting for a new mate and become their umm... sponsor.

In any society, very few individuals are able to acquire a substantial amount of wealth. Probably 1% of the total population will be wealthy. There will always be those few attractive individuals whether men or women who will be willing to do anything to access those resources especially when you live in a country where fuel is 120 bob a litre.

We tend to assume that the wealthy individuals we see are not human beings that have their own twisted personalities especially coming from a country where most of our millionaires acquired their wealth from taxpayer money. Sometimes the envy of sponsored individuals comes from the fact that life itself is unfair. You have probably been told all your life “Hard work pays... work hard and you will get all you need”. All this then you see someone on your social media feed whom you think has no acquired skills at all but is able to afford a lifestyle only you can dream of. If hard work made people wealthy, then the guy who brakes his back daily at the mjengo would be wealthy.

Maybe it’s time we recognize sponsored individuals for their bold initiatives and ingenuity. This is definite feedback that they are serving a need in society. A need to serve twisted fantasies, companionship or just a random ego boost from an attractive individual that makes people feel much better about themselves.

Maybe a study needs to be done in how sponsored individuals contribute to the economy whether it’s through foreign exchange, the people they employ at their businesses or how they elevate the financial status of their families.

You know what, you too probably need a sponsor in your life.