Women fighting over a husband

Aah, the weekend! Time off. With some it’s family time. It’s a fact that there are men and women out there who are in part time relationships. How do you know that you are someone’s part-time lover this weekend? This happens mostly to women so check out these red flags

  1. Your phone is dry. Yes. No messages. No calls. No notifications. Why? Because they are with their real bae
  2. You are taking pictures pretending to be happy when you really just want some attention. Pole, life is hard being a secondary bae. Take a selfie. They may just like it.
  3. The last time you met, they seemed to be in a hurry to be done with you. “Unataka M-pesa? Unataka Shopping? Unaenda Mombasa lini?”
  4. Their phone is off. Who would want to talk to you when they are hanging out with their real bae and kids?
  5. You suddenly realize that you have no friends. Being a side piece is hard and the fact that you are very secretive means that you have few friends or no friends at all. You are probably the person that says “I don’t have friends because people love to talk”. No, you don’t have friends because you are stealing spouses
  6. You don’t have a photo with them. Photos are evidence and that person you have stolen says “Lets keep our phones away because I love privacy”. Uwongo.
  7. Your facebook bio has the title ‘CEO’. CEO of Spouse Theft INC. is what you are
  8. Nobody really knows what you do or how you get your money. Yes, if you feel the need to hide what you really do and can’t justify the money, trips and photos you take, wewe unaibiana vitu za watu. Mshahara yako ni side piece allowance which I must say, is a lucrative job.
  9. You always get a new phone. Why, because the person you are stealing has to constantly apologize and bribe you with goodies. “Babe, umejam? Shika iPhone X”. Fungua duka ya simu
  10. The person you are stealing has saved you as “M-Pesa” on their phone.