There is a difference between a private and a hidden relationship. When the two of you decide to go private, people know you are dating and that’s that. The smallest of details like where you live, eat, vacations and lifestyle remain between the two of you and your closest friends.

But a hidden relationship is full of dishonesty and shame; you know that going public about the two of you will either bring pain or shame because it should not be happening in the first place.

This is where you will find most side chiqs and niggas. Most Kenyan celebrities have very public relationships, they lay everything bare on social media.

A few like Nyashinski, Octopizzo, Khaligraph, King Kaka, Femi One, Fena Gitu, Kartelo and Kamene Goro have very private relationships.

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Legendary rapper Nyashinski is married but we didn’t even know who he was dating! The rapper whose real name is Nyamari Ongegu had never posted her wife on social media, even when they were dating.

For almost 6 years they managed to keep their relationship on the down-low. He is a private guy, he rarely posts himself! Girls had been crushing on him since he made his comeback a few years back but only to have their hearts broken by wedding pictures.

Octopizzo, Kaka and Kartelo have wives and kids but we rarely see them. Yes we know they are dating but that is it.

Social media has been known to expose people to a lot of scrutiny and hate, so we can’t blame them for trying to shield them from all these negativity.

Here is the thing with people, they go through a lot of challenges on a daily and so when they see how ‘perfect’ your life is on social media trust me they will hate on you like yesterday.

Most of the time its pure jealousy, you and your woman are on a baecation and you post a picture, another woman wants the life that you have but can’t have it will see the picture and start posting very nasty comments about your woman.

Everybody can be a hater, even men that’s why some public figures in the industry chose to have very private love lives. It’s all about protecting your loved ones.

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People have different personalities, some love showing off everything to the masses but some just want a quiet life.

Kartelo for example has settled down with his girlfriend and they recently welcomed a baby into their family. Her girlfriend is not one to ‘vlog’ her life on instastories, even though her man is always in the public eye she prefers to remain behind the scenes.

Not everybody is going to be happy that you are finally happy and settling down. Instagram has this feature where you can tag your location whenever you post. Some haters really dislike you to the extreme and so when you tag your location, some might come for you to try and hurt you physically. This thing of showing everybody where you live literally throws your security to the wind.

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Having a public relationship though has its benefits brand-wise. People love the idea of ‘couple goals’ and so when you post how happy you guys are always is it generates more traffic to your socials. Brands and traffic are like bread and butter; they are best friends.

They will approach you for endorsement deals, they know the hype around the two of you will reach the target audience; families.

This is why Njugush and the Wajesus family are so big right now. When people see them, they see a ‘perfect’ love life, in reality, it doesn’t exist. MC Jessy was interviewing them recently and Njugush sed he and Wakvinye sometimes fight to the extent of not speaking to each other. People, however, have this idea that marriage is just beds and roses; the power of social media.

For me, the merits of a private relationship outweigh the demerits. Money and relevance is the only good thing that comes out of going public with your love life.

There are some things that should just remain between the two of you. Some content creators like the Wajesus Family have shown us everything there is to show, its only their sex life that is remaining.

We are all different human beings with very different personalities, chose the life that you want and live it the best way you know-how.

Check out more from Kim Koima’s blog.

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