I Would Pay Millions For Dowry, But Terms and Conditions Apply

Piece by: Kwarula Otieno
Lifestyle

This is something that is common in almost all communities in Kenya.  Although in some communities, the amount of dowry to be paid is extortionate.

For instance if you'll be marrying a Kikuyu woman, you should be ready to "reward" the family with 99 goats and it's for the lady's family to decide how much each goat costs. They might decide that each goat will goes for Ksh 20,000, now do the math.

And according to the 2013 marriage bill;

Where the payment of dowry is required ,to prove a marriage under customary law, the payment of a token amount of dowry shall be sufficient to prove a customary marriage.

There's been a conversation going on social media on what determines the amount of dowry to be paid for a lady. Education? Figure? Color?

Well, apparently there are parents who ask for millions in exchange for their daughters.

Can I pay millions for dowry?

Yes, but these terms and conditions apply;

1. Once I marry you, you become my property. I MUST approve anything you want to do, who you meet and even your friends.

2. If the marriage doesn't work, your family MUST agree to refund me with 75% of the amount paid.

3. I shall be allowed to beat you up whenever you make mistakes.

4. The woman Must be able to cook like Gordon James Ramsay.

5. I MUST be allowed to DEMAND GOOD sex anywhere, anytime.

6. I decide what to do with your salary.

7. You must always be ready with hot water to massage my feet each and every day till death do us apart.

8. Your family is NOT allowed to visit MY home unless they are willing to pay for accommodation.

9. You MUST be smart like Emilie Chatelet and beautiful like Meryem Uzerli.

10. Be ready to be treated like a property.

Check out some of the reactions on twitter;