Patriotic Kenyan Pens 16 Things That Might Happen If Kenya Goes Into War - MUST READ

Piece by: Kwarula Otieno
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As much as we'd all love to eat, spend money, sleep and repeat the same till the end of time, it's so unfortunate that the reality is not even something close that, just because we cannot coexist harmoniously. War is a terrible thing - we've all seen its effects in countries like Syria, Rwanda, South Sudan and even Somali. The images are not close to being impressive and I don't think any sane being would want to go through the same sh!t.

I, fortunately, came across this thought-provoking post by one Joshua Kembero Ogega on social media and I think it would be awesome for each and every Kenyan to check it out.

Whenever I see those South Sudanese registered vehicles in the streets of Nairobi, a number of things come into my mind:

  • What brought all those vehicles to Nairobi?
  • What if what happen(s)(ed)(ing) in South Sudan happened in Kenya?
  • Why is the Kenyan political class obsessed with making our country another African "basket case"?

I came across an article in the Star Newspaper with an article titled "ODM's Statement Regarding the Statements made by Kinuthia and Moses Kuria". I also listened to Kinuthia (or whoever that was) stating that members of the Luo community should vacate Nakuru. The Kenyan social media is ablaze with hate speech or is it ethnic-inspired vitriol?. It is despicable what is happening.

There are however a number of things (many things) that will happen if both sides make true their threats. Here is a sample:

1. You will kill each other, blood will flow.

2. If the violence goes unabated, the effects will start being felt after a week. There will be no fuel; your refrigerator will have nothing apart from the noise coming from the compressor (that is if you are fortunate enough to own one); Stadiums will be filled with people running away from the gory scenes in the suburbs and the slums.

3. CNN, BBC, MSNBC, Al Jazeera and all those cable news networks will be all over the place. Hovering like vultures. Their Nairobi bureau (or their Dar es Salaam bureau) will be booming with activity. The will retreat for news from Syria or about a dingy carrying Kenyan migrants (they refuse to call you refugees) that has sunk in the middle of the Mediterranean and come back with breaking news about a massacre in Nakuru or Kisumu or Kibera.

4. You will be forced to move out of the country. Lucky you if own a passport and have some dollars with you (Kenyan money will be s#*t money; worthless like the paper it is printed on). You will probably move to Zimbabwe (They don't require an advance visa application if you are from Kenya). The poor ones will troop to Tanzania or Uganda with probably a blanket, a mattress, a handful of clothes and a few worthless Kenyan currency notes.

14. You will reminisce the good old days. Like John Ruganda, you will probably write another "Shred of Tenderness" (That is if you were an educated tribalist masquerading as an academician in Kenya). You will write about the travails of life in the refugee camps and how glorious the past was.

15. Then we will be another Somalia. Since we deliberately killed the International Criminal Court in defense of our war lords, the world powers will not be bothered about the crimes against humanity, crime of genocide and war crimes committed in Kenya. They will laugh you off and remind you about the "monkey chants" you made about the ICC during your better days.

16. The guys at the top will probably agree to share power and they will write a joint newspaper article (like was done by Salva Kiir and Riek Machar) in the New York Times with the title "South Sudan(read Kenya) Needs Truth, Not Trials" which is high brow BS disguised as genuine concern.

And then you will remember that the likes of Mohamed Wehliye and Silas Gisiora Nyanchwani warned you that when you burn the country, you will be forced to share the refugee camps with the njaruo and okuyu you fought against.

Before you type that silly comment about Jubilee or CORD supporters or about a njaruo or okuyu, remember that you will on your own when the violence takes its toll on you.