Have you ever been on a blind date? How was it? Did you love your date or you ended up cursing that day?
Hii si kama blind date ya Meghan Markle and Prince Harry.
Well, brave Kenyan women have shared their first date experiences and from my view, our men need to up their game.
They need to borrow a leaf from the likes of Prince Harry, Nigerian superstar Davido among other romantic men.
Surprise her with an iPhone X, a brand new Mercedes Benz or that designer handbag so as to motivate her.
Or else if you have nothing to offer or carry yourself well on the first date, you might end up being blocked or worse, remain single F.O.R.E.V.E.R.
Anyway, below are Kenyan women’s reactions to first dates.
Aroma Khainga: After Kula pale tao. He told me “twende tupumzike nikupe massage” told him asiii me sijachoka!! And that was it.
Marion Ogallo: He asked me for sex.
Alice Cherono: Alishindia kunishikashika na kunipambaza mapaja.
Ann Mwanzia: Kuongea na food kwa mdomo…tena kama ananionyesha kitu… anavuruta mdomo ile design ya wamama wakipeana mushene.
Catrina Kinyatta: Huyu msee aliishi bedsitter. Sasa si akapika tukakula, kidogo kidogo akaingia Kwa choo. Niliskia “ndu” mi nlimtoka tuu roho safi.
De Adon: He has this character of poking his nose n making that kasound of “fffmmmm” n yet those days people would carry handkerchief like anywhere, everywhere then anasahau anataka kunishika tena… 😬
Cindy Betty: He ordered for me what to eat, wine glass ikiisha ikakaa hapo long nika assume haoni nikaita waiter aongeze akaintervene kuwa hiyo ingine nitalipia alikuwa amepangia dinner 3500 na sasa ishaafika 4k, sikumaliza hio dish akasongesha sahani akamaliza, like i still regret up to now why i waited for the dinner to end without leaving, he was touchy oh God i hate it!!! I asked him not to to touch me again. Oh i didnt say he proposed that night, called me mother of his twins and wanted to go werever with me, wah mpaka leo hio drama sitawahi sahau, i went home wrote him a text kuwa am not interested in him mpaka leo huwa napokea matusi.
Lydia Wangeci: Kuvututa chai shorororo ati ni moto damn na kunag vile nimekula chipo za 80bob😂😂😂 nilijiexcuse kwenda choo mpaka waleo.
Lelah Eve Nambuye: He gave me a date, itishad menu, akaniuliza wat I’ll take, nikaitisha then akasema yeye hakuli he’s just eaten at home, nikule tu, i ate to my satisfaction while ananikodolea macho, akionja onja kidogo, when I finished, excused myself to the ladies, and that’s how i left… Nikajipa shughuli. Fala alitaka tukule sahani moja na yeye…wtf.
Kate Maina: Aliniitishia mukimo ya thate na kikombe ya uji…twasnt my expectation though.
Shiks Karose: He didn’t use a toothpick alianza msxx,msxx that was a turn-off.
Judie Yamsie: Alikuja ame beba jelicans tatu na tumemeet archives yawa.
Estah Marshall: He said ‘lazima nitakuoa hata kwa madawa…’ there and then I knew I had to call my guardian Angels.
Debby Kendi: I was invited for a coffee date in Upperhill, I was shocked to be taken into a conference hall full of retired women kumbe they sell herbal coffee and some other products. The meeting took 2 hrs. I was absent-minded throughout the section. 😂😂😂😂That was the last day I picked his calls.
Sarafina Shiku Kahiro: He came wearing official outfit with sports shoes on a first date who does that really?
Nduta Kariuki: Was in Kampala n this cute guy took me out n 5 mins into the date “wen will u give me ur regs” ( insert heavy Ugandan accent) my Kenyan legs RAN!
Grace Omondi: Telling me that he’s married but wants me to be his baby mama. I just had to tell him am a lesbian and lesbians don’t make out with men more so giving birth
Nimmoh Ngunjir: I had just cleared college in Utalii so sikua na job..Dude was a HR manager in one of these big hotels in Nairobi..Apo nikajua nimeangukia bwana ako na pesa na nitapata Job pap!
So on this first date I was to go with my cv..
Woooi Nimmoh,kufika tu ivi the first thing I noticed was his teeth..Aki alikua na meno za brown miiiiiingi kama fefte fae hivi woiye😢..That was the longest 2hrs of my life. CV hata sikutoa kwa bag..Nilimwambia will bring next time na apo ndio alikulishwa block.
Ivy Lena: He was talking to me but addressing kila mtu in the hotel
He was just too loud and noisy. Nikimuambia apunguze sauti he was like am a teacher and we are used to talking a loud 😏😏😏😏That was just a no for me
Grace Omondi: Mwingine alipeleka altonas. Akasema ye huwa hakuli kuku za Nairobi coz GMO zote. Me Nlienda nkachukua ka quota kangu na chipo, Wueh. Tuseme alishambulia ka quota, nlipoona akiwa Karibu kunimalizia nkavuta Iyo karatasi nkamshow ananimalizia and he wasn’t supposed to eat it in the first place. Nlimkulisha block akapeleke watu wao u glutton. Conman wa chakula. Nkt
Edna Nyangaresi: Tukapewa nyama an the guy akachukua ile mfupa iko na bone marrow,,karibu aombe kijiti ya kutolea sema kugongesha kwa sahani ndio itoke hadi sahani ikapasuka🙊🙊wooooiii Edna kila MTU ako like🙀🙀yaani block till the forth coming of Jesus,,,sombary tell me its well😿😹😹siwezi ruka mkojo nikanyage mavi alaaaah
Caroline Seinkool: Adjusting the trouser Al the time hapa kwa zip for me to think amebeba kubwa sana inamshinda uzito(as if that was the reason we met anioneshe), pricking his nose immediately we have an eye contact! Smh 😫😏.
Grace Omondi: Another Luhya guy tuliishia kitengela. Alichomesha mbuzi, tulipoanza Kula nkaskia aki bargain bei ya room😬😬😬. Nlimalizana na nyama ivi nkaenda dance floor ku dance na Boyshald. Let’s say the sponsor aliboeka akaenda kwa gari yake tukaachwa kitengela with my friend. Good thing we were prepared na fare ya matatu.
MOTO WA KUOTEA MBALI! Kenyan Men From These Tribes Who Make The Worst Husbands