• Father Abraham is the common term used to refer to this men with up to four baby mamas.
Baby mama and baby daddy have become common terms used by Kenyans as it has become a norm for most.
People seem to be going back to the old ways just like our grandparents they are having multiple children with different women.
Hitting the streets, I got to gather a number of reasons as to why many men have up to four baby mamas and would never marry any of them
- Fear of commitment
The strong mothering pressure that most men experienced when growing up has resulted to fear of being controlled which is a common pattern. Men would then choose to get children from several women with no plans of settling down with any of them, as he has it in mind that in marriage there are tight rules and the woman might control him. Men do value their independence and freedom, and if failure of marriage would give them that then that’s it.
- Divided attention
Every woman loves undivided attention and that something you will hardly get when you are dating a guy with up to four baby mamas. You are out on a vacation them boom! A call comes in from the baby mama and demands that you attention to your child is not feeling well and demands your immediate attention. And just like that,your vacation is cut short leaving the woman devastated and feeling of loneliness.
- Fear of messing up
The fact that he could be a cheat, loves being with different women whenever he wants to, this would deter him from marrying any of his baby mamas. He is the problem and he knows it so he does not want to get into marriage. Another thing is the fear of messing up, they feel they are losers if their marriage fails and this fear makes them averse to marrying anyone but remain with the safe title of baby daddy.
When a woman has a baby with a man she is not married to, she expects he will take full responsibility for the child, sadly he may not. This is because she was deceived. When the woman starts to forcefully ask for support, they (men) classify her as rude and fail to get married to her. Rudeness makes them fear women.
- Baby mama drama
Being in a relationship with a man who has a baby mama let alone four other women can be overwhelming. This is especially if drama is involved and the baby mamas wont let your relationship thrive. Men fear settling with any of them as they believe that will make others jealous leading to unnecessary drama.Men fear that some will feel underappreciated and marrying one of them will make others demand for the same.And since most tribes do not allow polygamy,they choose to remain single and support them from afar.