A city woman has released hilarious notes and 22 rules to live by if you want to survive relationships in this brutal city called Nairobi.

If you missed the 2021 Women's Conference, here is what was discussed. Read, internalise and act on the notes.

This will help you deal with team mafisi, sponsors and slay kings.

Check them out...

1. Never have feelings for a sponsor.

2. Kila mwanaume ako na sauti but volume ni pesa.

3. Kama hakupanui mawazo....asikupanue miguu... and please, usioshe mtu mzima

4. Kama wewe ni side chic ucheze chini. Goat wife asikujue (tunauma tukipuliza kama panya).

5. Usipigie bwana ya mtu/sponsor kama hajakupigia don't be desperate.

6. Hakuna kukula fare lazima tu build trust. There is more you can get after that trust.

7. Hakuna ku invite mwanaume kwako akikufia huko utaambia watu nini?

8. Hakuna kufanya wifey duties kama wewe ni girlfriend...ukienda wewe chukua remote na pillow alafu uekelee miguu kwa meza...usijaribu kutoa hadi sahani kwa hiyo nyumba.

9. Usiwache vitu zako kwa boyfriend, labda mko wengi so usiumize mwenzako.

10. Hakuna kuzalia Sponsor.

11. If your man cheats on you kindly walk out, pain and hurt wasn't meant to be harvested at your doorstep.

12. Never stay in an abusive relationship.

13. If he doesn't go down on you kindly don't suck him. You're not a honey sucker.

14. If he asks you how many exes you have the number is 2, the one you broke up with and a childhood lover period.

15. Always have a backup plan sio kupeana roho 100%.

16. Fungua bank account mbili, ile unaweka 10k every month weka ATM ushago kwenyu then ile unaweka 500 monthly mpee hadi pin number, he will brag with you everywhere even to his friends and family how faithful you are. Hivyo ndo wamama wamenunua maploti.

17. Never leave a guy who gives you 20k for a guy who gives you 60k...I say never....date both of them and collect 80k.....

18. A man is never stolen.. He chooses where he wants to be.

19. If a man takes you somewhere romantic, remember... You've NEVER been there before.

20. Your current guy should know he's the greatest lover.

21. If you are caught cheating: rule number one Deny, rule number two, deny it my sister, rule number three, continue DENYING: rule number four: refer to rules number 1,2,3 above.

22. BE WISE & PRAYFUL