You know your mum is Kenyan when...

Piece by: Random Like Arum
Lifestyle

  1. She says “Hizo sahani ni za wageni”, even after you have already moved out of her house. Vyombo za wageni hold a special place in her heart. Don’t be the one to break them if you want to stay alive.
  2. Years ago befors she had a smartphone, she used to say “Hio simu ndio inaua watoto wa siku hizi…” but now, she is the one that forwards the propaganda. She will even mention it in conversation... “Uliona ile wozap nilikutumua juzi? Young people are spoilt these days”
  3. When you are young, she discourages you from dating. “Don’t date, you shouldn’t do bad manners” but when you get older, it changes to “Unaleta mtu lini? Nataka kuzeeka vizuri” which puts you in a dilemma because you probably took her advice and don’t know how to interact with members of the opposite sex.
  4. When you ask her for money she borrowed, she responds with “Hizo miaka zote nilikulea, utaweza kunilipa?” which silences you because the guilt trip is real.
  5. Among the skills that you are proficient in is cooking Ugali, sukuma wiki and nyama. The number one meal in Kenya. In fact, if you are ever stranded in a desert, you will probably dream of this meal because your mum made you love it.
  6. You are still nervous and look around whenever a kissing scene comes on TV. In fact, a voice in your head says “Hio ni tabia gani mbaya munaona kwa TV?”
  7. You are her trusted adviser in all matters technology. You will literally get a call at midnight as she says “Maiko, hii TV ulininunulia nazima aje? Alafu, kwanini simu yangu haisemi wozap imeingia? Kuja utengeneze”
  8. When you tell your mum “I love you” she immediately shifts the conversation to “Aki I have been broke. Si unitumie ka M-Pesa kidogo?”

Show your mother love today by sending her something on M-PESA.