'I was balancing tears,' Kambua narrates how ex boyfriend body shamed her badly

Piece by: Grace Kerongo
Lifestyle

Gospel singer and media personality Kambua Manundu has become a beacon of hope for many women.

She recently opened up about how insensitive people online can be about personal struggles. On mother's day Kambua wrote a special message to women with "open hearts and empty wombs."

Kambua wrote, "Some because of illness, infertility, others miscarriage, and infant loss. Women who, beneath the pomp and flair, secretly dread #mothersday because it is a constant reminder of what they don't have, what they lost, or what they may never have.

Well, I don't have the luxury of living a "private" life, and have often been the subject of ridicule and mockery for being "childless".

Reminds me of Hannah and Penninah. You see, painful as it was, Hannah needed Penninah to provoke the situation. And God moved to show Himself strong in Hannah's life.

Beloved, I don't know what category you fall under- the infirm woman, the infertile, the barren, the angel mom (just respond with a 💗)... what I do know is this: God's ways are good, and they are perfect. So is His plan for your life.

Also, #motherhood is a great calling, but it is not the only one. As you wait on God to fill your nest (however which way He chooses), keep praising Him. With raised hands and an open heart. Happy Mother's Day to you! I'm praying for you."

Now, after encouraging the childless couples, Kambua spoke to all the girls battling with body image issues.

She narrates how she once dated a man who body shamed her. And how she dealt with the situation.

"Many years ago, I was dating this guy, I was living life on the chubbier side of life. I was a lot heavier than I am now. I was fresh from high school and I met this guy, we liked each other so we started dating," Kambua explained.

"But this guy has a serious issue with my weight. And he was constantly showing me different exercises. He has a lot of advise to give me. It did not bother me too much. There was a time he said something like, 'You finished a whole chapo by yourself? A whole chapo?'"

Kambua added, "That was like strike two and a half. Strike three was this one time we were going out for a late lunch we went to a fast food place so he bought one piece of chicken for me, one for himself and a pack of fries for us to share.

So, please keep in mind that i'm already conscious about my weight, what I eat around this guy because of what he said about the chapo. We start eating, I'm eating very slowly nibbling on my chicken taking a fry here and there, then halfway through the meal he goes like 'I don't think you should eat any more fries.'

She continued, "He takes the rest of the pack and continued to eat. so I just swallowed a kiwaru, literally. as I'm eating my chicken, he goes like, are you going to finish that, K? and I handed my chicken over to him. Everything inside me, it was like a mixture of balancing my tears, feeling humiliated, hungry and angry."

Kambua made and excuse to leave early.

"Because we were meant to hang out that afternoon, I was so furious, I told him I had somewhere else to be so lets hook up whenever."

"Guys, I just matched myself to the nearest bakery and I ordered two pieces of cake; chocolate and Vanila and tea. I sat down and I ate all of it. By myself."

"I wanted to stuff that emotion down, stuffing myself with cake, stuffing the anger, the humiliation. Everything. I ate it all in one siting."

Adding, "The relationship, obviously did not last. What I learnt from it is, don't be with someone who body shames you be with someone who celebrates who you are in every season of your life.

And if you have a weakness or you are struggling with something then they are able to help you work through that struggle but not putting you down because of it . I look back now and i can laugh about it but I really hope you can hear what i'm saying."

Other city women reacted to the body shaming story and retold their own tales.

Here are some of their comments.

paulynmarura: I'm kinder in the same situation that you were Kambua, the guy that I'm currently dating body shames about my tummy, he keeps reminding me that I should check on what I eat, funny enough I am an appetite person u can't just help it when I see food... So at times when Im around him I have to hold my stomach😣😣 i really hate it and not tht my stomach is big, wondering if he is dating my tummy🙄🙄🙄🤦🤦

miss_fridam: My mum body shames me😂😂😂😂 She says my collarbone looks like a cloths hanger coz she doesn't like me wearing clothes that show that part of my neck.

conniey.amoi said, "TRUTH. I TOLD MY FRIEND THIS EARLY LAST WEEK AND SHE THOUGHT I WAS JOKING. THE BOYFRIEND KEEPS INSULTING HER (OVER HER WEIGHT) AND I TOLD HER TO DITCH THE GUY. SHE'S NIT LISTENING TO ME. I'M SHARING YOUR COMMENT WITH HER ASAP!"

ms.sebastian_kenya: Women who are older than me always tell me that when they were my age they were as small or smaller than me so even I when I get babies I'll grow as big as they are now. Even the ones I meet at the gym. It leaves me wondering whether it's admiration or warning

trisheeroh: As a plus size woman, i have heard it all! The one that pissed me off the most is when my neighbor thought it appropriate to express her concern to MY MUM and say things like.

r.wanyoike: Kambua one day I was dating this guy and he asked me " waah hio ni tumbo" I was so embarrassed I left and went. This days I fear dating coz I can't deal with someone always wanting me to change for him.I was always big I tell u and I have tried it all its tough I tell u.