Motivational speaker Sam West has some life-saving advise for anyone getting into a relationship with a child.

In the African setting, some people have a preference as to what gender a child should be when they are getting into the dating scene.

In an exclusive interview with Mpasho, Sam says speaking from his own experience introducing the person you are dating to your child should be a gradual process.

Sam is a father of one, He takes care of his son himself.

"Do not rush to introduce a child to a person you are dating. Wait until the relationship is solid and you are sure you will [pursue a relationship with this person.

If you must, do not introduce them as a lover introduce them as a friend first and see how they relate.

To avoid affecting a child's psychological well-being, Introduce your partner gradually."

Sam says with time one will be able to find out if their partner is faking it or not.

"You cannot fake it forever with time you will know if someone is genuine.

 If there is no connection you will see."

He was also of the opinion that one should inform the person they intend to date that they have a child on the first date.

"If you are getting into a relationship and you have a child, let the person know on the first date,

Do not hide it.

Let the person know that you come as a package. If they want you with a child well and good if not it's still ok.

They should love you and the person you are with. If the person still wants to pursue you they will."

Last week there was a debate on Classic 105 on why most men prefer dating single mothers who have girls as compared to those with boys.

Most callers argued that a man will always want to know their roots hence the fear of boys going to look for their dad whether dead beats or not.

Radio presenter Mike Mondo questioned what criteria Kenyan men use when dating single mothers.

According to Mwalimu King'ang'i, most men prefer dating a single mother who has a daughter as compared to those with baby boys.

Mike says he has in the past dated a single mum to a boy adding that the experience was amazing

"I love single mothers.

They are the most focused and self-driven individuals you can find in this Nairobi

Does it matter whether 

I have dated a single mother before, she had a boy and it was an amazing relationship.

Such women are very aligned and focused. I don't think it matters whether a woman has a boy or a girl."

It should not matter.

Mwalimu King'ang'i was not convinced.

"They are wonderful but that boy will one day go back and look for his dad.

Most men fear this a lot, when they are dating they put this at the back of their mind.

Boys will always want to know where they got their character and who there dad is."

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