date mistakes

Dating isn’t easy at the best of times but relationships become significantly more difficult when a narcissist is involved.

Unfortunately these people tend to ‘hate people’ but ‘love attention’, which is why they will do anything to be the centre of anyone’s world.

Narcissists take part in a ‘drama triangle’ to facilitate this – something all men and women need to be aware of.

If people are worried about the possibility of dating a narcissist Dr Lishman said the qualities are really difficult to pick up on early on.

This is because at the beginning of new relationships people tend to be on their ‘best behaviour’.

The psychologist explained that even subtle red flags are difficult to spot because they’re qualities everyone has shown at some point in time.

‘Some little hints or signs you might notice though is that they talk about themselves a lot,’

‘Everything often revolves around them, even when they are talking about you. They are overly charming, they feel superior to other people and if there is conflict, it is everybody else’s fault, or everyone is an idiot.’

Narcissists have unusual ideas about boundaries with people which can make others feel uncomfortable.

This is because they often feel entitled and they blame others for their bad behaviour.

‘Another big manipulative thing that narcissists are known for is ‘gas lighting’. This means that they behave poorly or wrongly, then their partners might pull them up for it, and then a narcissist will turn it around to be their partners fault,’ she said.

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‘This results in their partner feeling terrible and as though it was all their fault.’

What are the signs of a narcissist?

– Superiority and entitlement

– Exaggerated need for attention and validation

– Perfectionism

– Great need for control

– Lack of responsibility—blaming and deflecting

– Lack of boundaries

– Lack of empathy

– An inability to be truly vulnerable

– An inability to communicate or work as part of a team

– Anxiety

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