'We dated and then broke up' Isaac Mwaura's wife narrates struggles of being a politician's wife

Piece by: Queen Serem
Lifestyle

Jubilee nominated MP Isaac Mwaura and his wife Nelius Mukami met through a mutual friend and later spread their wings further and reconnected through Facebook.

"We started chatting in 2012. Mwaura asked for my number, and at first, I declined but later agreed," Nelius told the Star

DATING

Mukami, who is in her late 20S, describes herself as a fun-loving and adventurous person and loves travelling.

"Mwaura requested for a coffee date. At the time, I was working at the Transparency International in Upper Hill, while he was working at the Prime Minister's office. After the date, he escorted me to board a matatu at Odeon.

Mukami says she had no problem with Mwaura, being a person living with albinism.

"Albinism was not an issue to me because I got information about disability very early and I had a neighbour back home who had three family members with Albinism. I also went to a high school that had a deaf section and I used to spend time with them," she said. "Even getting children with albinism was not and is still not an issue to me."

"We dated for a while and then broke up although we were still in contact. We reconnected in 2014. We were still friends. We would talk but not about anything concerning love. Then in 2014, valentines day, he asked me to go for coffee, which I didn't make since I had plans with my friends.

In August 2015, he had told me that he would never propose to me because it was obvious and we had talked about marriage and everything but he later pulled a surprise proposal during my friend's daughter birthday party. It was a surprise but I kind of expected it," Mukami said.

"My family was okay with me marrying Mwaura, but the only issue they had was that he is a politician. I did not know what I was to expect as a politician's wife but I am now learning how to cope," she said.

CHALLENGES AS A POLITICIAN'S WIFE

"The biggest challenge is the unrealistic expectations from people that you have money and you can solve many of their problems. The society expects that as a politician's wife, you are supposed to drive big cars, be pampered, go to big hotels and shouldn't use matatus. Whenever I use matatus, people are always curious," she said.

"The worst part was being trolled on social media, the snide comments I got from my friends and even family and of course the uncertainty in people’s faces. Of course, there was the obvious issue of the fact that my husband is a person living with albinism.

"There is also so much pressure and stereotypes about politicians. People think they are not always there for their families/ I think it is all about a person's personality. My husband chooses to be with his family. We support his work fully. He spends most of his weekends with us at home. He also helps a lot in raising our baby."

WEDDING

Mwaura and Mukami married in 2015, at a colourful wedding at Citam with, the reception being held at Evergreen Gardens, Kiambu Road.

"After the weeding, we got an invitation to State House from President Uhuru [Kenyatta], where we had some drinks with him and took photos.Uhuru gave us a good voucher which I can't reveal.

Thereafter, they jetted off to Bali Island for their honeymoon.

Bali is said to be one of the best tourist attraction sites in Indonesia.

"Our honeymoon was another surprise to me because I learnt about it at the airport. I still hope we can go back there," she said.

PREGNANCY

"After our first anniversary, we learnt that we were expectant.

It was a difficult pregnancy. I could not eat, I was vomiting all through. The pregnancy was so heavy that I could not walk and for several times I experienced bleeding, dehydration and most of the period, I was on bed rest.

At the eighth week, after the scan, I discovered I was carrying triplets. The kids came early at 28 weeks. They were kept in ICU. The first one passed on after two days, the second one on the 10th week. On the 12th week, I was discharged with my son, Njiru who will be turning two years soon.

However, no child dies without a legacy,. It is up to us to keep the legacies of our babies alive. My son and daughter taught me so much, they taught me about endurance, about having a fighting spirit, about grace but most importantly they taught me how to love. They introduced me to a world of genuine love and care, the kind of love that is pure and unconditional. I saw beauty in their eyes, even though we never spent a lot of time with them, their beautiful faces will never be forgotten to me."

Mukami said they are planning to go back to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit and take a cake to the nurses on Njiru's second birthday. Then later probably we can celebrate with family and friends.

DEPRESSION

"I have been fighting depression since last year in April, immediately after I left hospital. I was in and out of depression between April and December. During that period, we drifted apart with some friends although there were those who stayed and supported me fully," she said

"It was the support that was around me and acknowledging that I was there to support my child. At the same time, I realised my weight was an issue, and I focused on losing it. I took time to celebrate myself and my wins, hang out with my family and laugh with well-meaning friends. I sang and danced in my car (I still do), shopped for and wore clothes that brought me joy, I went for photo shoots, meditated, still journaled and took time to cultivate experiences that were more relaxing, recharging and revitalising for myself," she said.

The worst troll was when people linked the death of her children to the political life of her husband.

"I handle the trolls with silence because I know they are coming from bitter people who use a pseudo accounts. No one hits a dead dog, and therefore, so long as you are alive, people will always find something to talk about you, either positive or negative," Mukami said.

Mukami does events planning, corporate events and also fashion and designs. She also doubles in personal styling for some of her friends.