Life in typical Kenyan universities is all about hustling to succeed and change your family’s perception of you (as a failure), meeting your dream girl, maturing up, getting ready for employment and discovering the worst thing you can do that could slap you with a break up.

It is also the place where both student and lecturer strikes make headlines which seem to impress no one, because they are too common. However, the positive side of everything is that it’s where some of the most inspiring leaders, entrepreneurs, actors and news anchors are made.

While going through campus you’ll definitely come across these types of lecturers.

1. The young hunk

This is usually the talk of the entire university. He’s always that recent university graduate who got attached to lecture your worst modules; he magically converts them into some of your favorites. The worst part about it is that you’ll never have the damn courage to admit that he’s your crush. Argh.

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However, I feel you. I have a trick for you; why not pretend to be taking a selfie for your memoir and use it for your own pleasure?

2. The outdated bozo

This one will still give you examples of historical fall outs of stock trading instead of bringing up the current stock crisis hitting China or Greece. He’ll try to be cool by quoting an old Avril song lyrics. He’ll bore you to death such that you’ll sleep your way out of his lesson everyday. How to deal with this? Just make your own notes and read ahead of him. Trust me, you’ll come out a champion at the end. Or simply raise this with the varsity management – if you don’t fear being called a snitch.

3. The copy-paster

I’ve experienced this and it was super-annoying. He’ll literally say things from the book and not give any useful perspective related to the topic. For example, he’ll not give fun examples in an entrepreneurship module.

I’m not saying that he has to wear a nerdy T-shirt with a younger Bill Gates on it or with a Dangote quote, he just has to stop being lazy. He should come with interesting video tutorials and white papers from the latest research projects from other local universities and share with you. He should teach you how not to be a cheater in exams and not give you hints on how to do it perfectly!

4. Mr. Torturer

He’ll favor the sexiest girl in the class by giving her highest marks – even if they don’t work hard – and makes you slog harder to earn the paltry marks you’ll get at the end of the semester. If there’s a team-building activity in let’s say Lake Nakuru, he’ll make you cut a tree for firewood (especially now that we’re in July) while he keeps his sweetheart (your #WCE) busy.

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5. Mr. Don’t care

He rarely comes to class. When he comes, he’s always late and just gives you ‘read more’ pointers such that exams come when you’re least ready. If you’re in his class, the failure rate in end of semester exams is definitely over 60 percent.

That’s why our graduates have to toil hard to survive through campus, and when they do, they don’t have the best practical knowledge to take on employment in the East African market. Research from the Inter University Council for East Africa (IUCEA) shows that only half of the 50,000 graduates are ready for employment. What does that tell you?!

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